When we talk to our kids using harsh, hurtful and critical words, they are bound to get depressed or act out and resort to other means to feel bettter or attract our attention.Bullies are a great example.They are mostly children of parents who raised them in harsh, brutal conditions, full of cruel judgment and worse, subjecting them to beating and abuse of all kinds.Another example, which I often encounter in my classes, are the kids whose parents are never satisfied with their children's grades.These poor creatures have to suffer constant criticism, the feeling their parents don't accept them for who they are.They are constantly after the highest grade, for fear their parents might judge them again.All they want is to feel loved, accepted by the people who brought them to this world and whose only mission is to love and accept their child unconditionally and without any prerequisites.What's worse, and personally I believe it embarrasses and shames other teachers, is when teachers actually degrade their students,humiliating them instead of lifting them up and teaching them lovingly without any criticism, like they swore to do.
Sadly, over the past decades there is an oganised campaign of the media against women and girls.We are told we should look like the zero sized models of today.That is indirect bullying, manipulation and brainwashing of the worst kind.It is excruciating to see teenage girls suffering from anorexia, and many even dying in the process trying to live up to the modern beauty standards.These girls should be told that they are enough, that they are lovable.They should be told it's Ok to love their body no matter what its size is.Self- esteem and beauty stem from within, from our soul.Noone should be judged solely on their looks or size.Thankfully there are some voices that have started protesting against this status quo and they are becoming louder.More and more plus-sized,curvy, luscious girls are becoming models and speaking out about the significance of loving yourself the way you are. About the significance of body diversity. That's after all where all the change will come from.A society of diverse individuals, both in body type and character,accepting themselves,accepting others.A place of love.
As adults we tend to behave to ourselves as unlovingly and harsh as if to a person we loathe, usually as a result of our parent's illogical expectations and beliefs that got ingrained in our minds and which we tend to reproduce in our daily lives-rather unconsciously. We hoard things around us to make up for our lack of self-esteem and self-love.We find it unbearable to accept praise, because we never got used to receiving it from our parents.We overeat to try fill the emotional void in our hearts.We indulge in substance abuse of all sorts.We cling to a specific image or behave in a certain way, trying to fit in and be accepted by others,when all we really need is to accept and love ourselves unapologetically.Praise ourselves like we would praise a friend in need.We need to believe we are more than enough and we don't need to conform to the rules of society or other people.
All it takes is affirming this to ourselves daily.I AM ENOUGH.Say it like a mantra.Believe it.After all the mind, your very powerful servant, will do what you command it to do.It can influence your body and your reality.Choose consciously to alter the way you speak to yourself, choose to believe you are enough.Choose to believe you are a good person.Choose to believe you like eating healthy.Choose to believe you like the work you do, what you contribute.You get the point.You are the master of your mind.Instruct it wisely.You shape your reality.Make it a good one.And never stop saying and believing that you are ENOUGH.Love yourself enough to do so.YOU ARE ENOUGH.You don't need anyone's permission for that.
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With love, light and beauty,