It would be an oversight on my part not to mention that there is,to some extent, good reason for us to feel that way.The world which we have created is feeding off negativity and fear.So,it encourages it and gives all the more reason to continue feeling negative.Too many bills and not enough money is one of the major reasons for stress,fear and uncertainty. If you don't look like a Victoria's Secret model,then your body is not up to par and thus it is subject to all possible forms of body shaming. You don't have enough money,you're not prestigious,your country might be attacked by terrorists,the world will come to an end.....there is a huge variety of potential threats,imagined or real that can be used to make us remain in this web of negativity.The mass media has become really adept at using this very handy tool to keep us that way to serve its own agenda no doubt.
Oftentimes,stress and negativity can be sourced back to one's family and the conditions they had to endure.An abused child will most definitely be much more negative in its outlook.A child that was neglected will certainly feel it's never going to be enough and continue playing this role well into its adult life as well.A child that grew up in poor conditions will feel stressed out and negative about money,possibly for the rest of its life.Many are the reasons in one's life that can trigger such a hideous predisposition.
I can only relate too well with both parameters of stress and negativity mentioned before.The family conditions I grew up in were far from perfect,though there were always the best of intentions.But you know what they say....the road to hell is paved with all these"good" intentions.I really wouldn't want to go too deep into my family's wretched story.Suffice it to say that as a child I witnessed fights of monstrous proportions,daily bickering over trivial as well as significant matters and endless amounts of stress and guilt.That's my life pretty much up to 25 years old.As I started becoming more independent and living as an adult,naturally all those feelings reared their very ugly heads all too often.That's when the societal pressures kicked in big time, to look a certain way,dress and behave like this or that celebrity,become rich by somebody else's standards......you name it. Till today.I'm not proud to say this.I am the one that will encourage others to feel more positive,giving them ways to do so.If I were to describe myself I would say that I am a positive person,with a bright disposition,but with a very nasty streak of negativity,stress and anger.Sometimes I feel bipolar.Thank God,I know for a fact I am not.
About 5 years ago,following the aftermath of my father's death and all the guilt and grief,I decided that I needed to figure a way to shift my mentality.A way to cope with all the baggage of my life and my current circumstances.I found yoga to be soothing and uplifting.Meditation followed,which I presently do daily,at least once a day.It helps me keep my mind focused and serene,more able to see through the crap and get a hold on my life.A series of diets followed.Today,having become a vegan,which I consider one of the most important decisions I made and working out six days a week,I feel I FINALLY have a better grip on my life and where I'm headed.I do stress occasionally,I get negative from time to time(with really nasty consequences) but it's a pattern I've learnt to discern and endeavor to fight off consciously.My ambition is to fully eradicate this plague from my life completely one day.May be I will not become a Zen monk,but a happy peaceful,guiltless,stress-free life would be enough for me.
Concluding,I would like to give 5 reasons why you should attempt to get rid of all the negativity and stress from your life.The Internet is awash in such lists so,doubtlessly,you're not unfamiliar with this topic.This is my list,coming from lessons my own life taught me.I would not presume to impose anything on anybody.But if something I've been through and learnt from can help somebody in the slightest,that would be tremendous.So, here goes.
1.Negativity and stress feed off you.Like parasites.That results in various allergies,weight gain,and more serious diseases,like cancer,heart attacks and others.It trashes your immune system so your body is too weak to fight off any illness.It becomes much more vulnerable and unwilling to fight for your well-being. My skin is usually the recipient of such negativity attacks,exploding in various rashes and allergies.It often becomes Itchy and intolerant to almost everything.Not something I would wish on anyone,friend or foe.Headaches,stomach aches, low blood pressure panic attacks, you name it.Been there,more times than I can count.
2.Stress has been proven to trigger obsesity.When cortisol levels rise in the body,it sets off the process of weight gain.I vividly remember that the most stressful periods in my life were also marked with a significant weight gain.Of course, I should mention that it was a blissful period of gobbling down everythhing I could get my hands on.I would justify it to myself,saying "I.'m hungry,OK?When I am sad and stressed I eat." So, my body having been granted permission,started expanding exponentially.To monstrous dimensions.One day, I looked in the mirror and was appalled and disgusted.Excuses,excuses.....I've learnt to recognise and control this pattern by now.When I feel stressed or more negative than allowed I resort to yoga,meditation or just mindful breathing.I've found that music and reading also soothe such negativitiy atacks.
3.It seriously affects your performance in your daily duties.Be it at home or at work.I've found that when I allowed myself to wallow in such bouts of stress,my home would be a battle field,much to my husband's dismay.My teaching became bland,without love or enthusiasm.It's not like me to hate teaching.But in those moments of stress,negativity and utter self-pity,I did.My students sensed it of course.Their grades dropped and I did not manage to have high passing rates in the exams.I 've always prided myself on being able to connect to my students.Never have I felt so disconnected from myself or my students and the job I love so much as in those moments.Not something to be proud of.But it's taught me that I should never let it under my skin like that again.
4.Your relationships with others suffer.Big time.Disconnect,loathing,fighting.....been there,done it.Again,I'm not proud admitting this. I've hurt people I love.My daughter...my husband.My friends.Colleagues.MY family..Seeing what it can do to me, I attempt to distance myself in moments of stress and focus on battling the reason behind my negativity rather than lashing out on anyone who is unlucky enough to be at the receiving end of my anger. Lots of relationships can be saved in this way.Not having to carry the load of guilt that ensues is a definite plus.
5.Self-hate.A lot of it.In reality,this is the final step,what it all comes down to after you've done all the above.After successfully having dealt an effective blow to yor body's immune system,gained weight and you feel ugly and old,after your energy drops to unfathomable depths and your performance and relationships start to suffer,then self-hate kicks in.Thus initiating a vicious cycle of wallowing even deeper in self pity,eating more,gaining weight,perhaps drinking or other substances.People in your life don't understand you and you get isolated.Not a very pleasant situation,is it?Been there.It's a lonely,dark place.I don't ever want to revisit it.So far,for the past six months I've been successful.And I plan to keep it that way.
So,that was the big lesson today.A post that wasn't meant to be this long,but I got carried away again.Hope you will be able to find value in this somehow.Have a beautiful,positive day!